TRANSCRIPT
Hello followers, it’s Dr. Pig, the psychiatrist here. Today I’m going to explain to you in layman’s terms the difference between the brain and the mind. It’s actually very simple.
The brain is the thing between your ears, all that gray mushy stuff that defines your thoughts, your behavior, your character, your personality, and whatever pathological deficits you have in those areas. Your brain is created and controlled by your genetics. It’s all very, very complex and very scientific—far too complex for most people to comprehend in any meaningful way. So I won’t go into it anymore. Suffice to say that psychiatrists understand the brain and non-psychiatrists don’t, so you’ll just have to take my word for this.
So now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, let’s talk about the mind. This, by comparison, is an easy subject to discuss. The bottom line is that the mind is a fanciful idea created by lesser people like psychologists and social workers to give themselves something to spend their days thinking about.
This so-called mind also supposedly lives inside your head, though no one’s ever seen it, nor smelled it, nor touched it. There isn’t even a single test to prove it exists, so technically it does not exist. Personally, I like to think of it as the imaginary friend of a weak person’s brain. That’s why we psychiatrists ignore it, except of course when patients come into our offices and complain about it.
I know how they complain about it, in which case we treat it like any other delusion and we drug it. Oh, and we have lots of wonderful drugs to make it go away: antidepressants, mood stabilizers, sleep aids, and of course antipsychotics. We also have all sorts of labels by which we can diagnose the mind in order to fool the people who believe in it into feeling that we are taking them seriously, and also so that their insurance companies will pay us. And oh, they paid us so well.