TRANSCRIPT
FORGIVENESS AND BLAME, PART 2
Most people in the psychology field and most people in our world in general don’t have much of an adult perspective on working through traumas. They have the perspective of feeling rage, feeling upset, feeling angry, holding people responsible, but never knowing what to do with it and just staying stuck in it.
And so a convenient way to avoid getting stuck in it when they have no concept of working through a longer process is just to avoid it entirely. Avoid blaming parents — let them off the hook.
DELUDED THERAPISTS
Another thing that is sad and sickening that I see so often in the psychology field is that many therapists truly believe, as much as they can consciously believe, that they actually are already healed. They’ve done their work, and the sad thing is what I observe is they actually haven’t done much work.
They’ve done some, sometimes done some very legitimate work, but not that much, and they don’t really see themselves as on a process anymore. And so they don’t know how to help people they’re working with do any better than they’ve done themselves. They don’t know how to help people go into territory that they’ve never explored.
And so… if they’re avoiding concepts like blame, if they’re preaching forgiveness – which is all too common – really what they’re saying is that they have never learned how to deal with their own unresolved blame at the people who wounded them and that they have prematurely forgiven.
And to me, that’s deadly and dangerous if your goal in life is to grow.